This evening, I went to a meeting where a missionary from South Africa shared his story and asked for help with a special project. I have heard him speak before and have followed him on social media for a while, so I had an idea of what he would be presenting. Surprisingly, I heard more than a compelling story and good reasons for why I should help with his project; he spoke to us about his struggles on the mission field, his disillusionment with church culture, and his journey back to loving God’s people. He did not sugar coat his feelings or mistakes, and he refused to be politically correct.
His transparency was refreshing, and it made me think; why do we shy away from letting people see our brokenness?
Deep down, I think many of us fear rejection. We are afraid that if people see our struggles, they will look at us differently. They might judge us for being less than perfect, even though they have their own imperfections. If individuals knew our deepest pain and hidden issues, they might use it as a weapon or a way to disqualify us from doing something. Transparency can be risky. Every time we get “real”, we take the chance of losing friends, status, and opportunities. We can be paralyzed by what others think of us. I know I am guilty, at times.
The speaker tonight could have been rejected when he talked about his former issues with suicidal thoughts and daily struggles with anger and bitterness. Instead, he received smiles, understanding, and encouragement. What gave him the courage to take the risk? The answer – he is motivated by love, rather than fear. He is no longer allowing brokenness to be a weapon used against him but instead is using it as a tool to heal others. He is more concerned with people knowing the truth, and getting free, than preserving his reputation.
Often times, the things we want to hide from others may be the very things they need to hear. Someone struggling to regain their faith does not need to hear about others’ perfect faith; they need to hear what it was like when you almost lost yours. The man or woman fighting an addiction needs to hear where you have failed and gotten back up. People also need to hear about the battles you are still facing. They need real stories and real hope, not a person that is pretending to have it all together.
Your transparency could bring healing to those with issues like self-hatred, guilt, addiction, and abuse. Is it worth the risk to you?